09-13-2008, 02:02 PM
|
 |
Moderator
|
|
Join Date: Oct 2007
Location: small town in the Northwest- population 400 (+2)
Posts: 5,626
Thanks: 2,680
Thanked 1,617 Times in 1,130 Posts
|
|
The Year of the Cloned Candidates
This woman is fuuunnny! Across the board humor. 
We have been approaching this presidential race the wrong way. It’s not political science. It’s science fiction. Something is amiss in the space-time continuum.
The candidates running now are not the same ones we started out with. It’s “Invasion of the Body Snatchers” all over again. We’re watching the clash of the pod people.
Quote:
|
The first hint that things were not what they seemed came when Barack Obama turned into Hillary Clinton. We believe this was engineered by Hillary fans who had seen that early “Star Trek” episode about the woman who wanted to be a starship commander so bad that she figured out a way to switch brains with Captain Kirk. They did not anticipate, however, that the new “Barack” would start giving boring policy speeches and muttering about inexperienced people coming out of nowhere, fooling the voters with oblique promises of change.
|
Quote:
Gov. Sarah Palin had only been on the Republican ticket about a week before she became a totally different person.She has obviously been replaced by a Sarah shell, stuffed with bits and pieces of John Kerry and Mitt Romney.
The replacement, in fact, announced itself on national TV. Why else, when Palin was describing being asked to run for vice president, did she keep insisting: “I didn’t blink.”
|
Quote:
Still, you cannot blame McCain for misrepresentation. He has mutated into so many different versions over the past few months, his memory banks are probably totally shot.
The real senator from Arizona was apparently replaced by a cranky android sometime last spring. The switch came to light when the android McCain conducted an interview with Time in which he seemed to be channeling Grandpa Simpson.
Now, the Republicans have acquired a warmer, gender-gap-closing Johnbot, which seems to have gotten its programming from those TV series in which sensitive men spend all their time applauding their girlfriends’ achievements and talking about feelings.
|
Here's the clincher 
Quote:
|
But we’ve still got the original Joe Biden, I think. Show me the artificial life form that would introduce a state senator confined to a wheelchair by urging him to “stand up.” We worried that once Obama’s running mate got out on the campaign trail and started babbling, he’d have to be replaced by a terser model. But this week, when Biden announced that Hillary Clinton was not only qualified to be vice president, she also “might have been a better pick than me,” we knew for sure we were still working with the original.
|
This lady could seriously write for that redneck in the cut off shirt. |
Salty's Blog
Linear Mode
