the new dollar

Newdollar.jpg

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http://thecourier.typepad.com/rightonthemark/

"To educate a man in mind but not in morals is to educate a menace to society." --- Theodore Roosevelt

making economic sense...

A president's pension currently is $191,300 per year, until he is 80 years old.

Assuming the next president lives to age 80, Senator McCain would receive ZERO pension, as he would reach 80 at the end of two terms as president.

Senator Obama would be retired for 26 years after two terms and would receive $4,973,800 in pension.

Therefore it makes economic sense to elect McCain in November, 2008.

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http://thecourier.typepad.com/rightonthemark/

"To educate a man in mind but not in morals is to educate a menace to society." --- Theodore Roosevelt

Abslo-utely!

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Salty

THANKSGIVING MENUS AND TIPS

A GREAT PLACE TO SHOP

That doesn't "look like" all of the other faces on the dollar bills...

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"You get the respect that you give" - cnredd

I need a Bambalance

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"Destiny must be shaped and not left to mere chance."..Spencer Collins

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"As in a poker game where the chips were concentrated in fewer and fewer hands, the other fellows could stay in the game only by borrowing, when their credit ran out, the game stopped."
--Marriner S. Eccles, FDR's fed Chairman. (1951)

My cousin from "the other LA" sent this to me.

One morning, three Cajuns and three Yankees were in a ticket line at a train station. The three Northerners each bought a ticket and watched as the three Cajuns bought just one ticket.

'How are the three of you going to travel on only one ticket asked one of the Yankees.

'Watch and learn,' answered one of the boys from Louisiana . All six boarded the train where the three Yankees sat down, but the three Cajuns crammed into a toilet together and closed the door.

Shortly after the train departed, the conductor came around to collect tickets.

He knocked on the toilet door and said, 'Ticket, please.' The door opened just a crack and a single arm emerged with a ticket in hand. The conductor took it and moved on.

The Yankees saw this happen and agreed it was quite a clever idea. Indeed, so clever they decided to do the same thing on the return trip and save some money.

That afternoon when they got back to the station, they bought a single ticket for the return trip and watched, while to their astonishment, the three Cajuns didn't buy even one ticket.

'How are you going to travel without a ticket?' asked one of the perplexed Yankees.

'Watch and learn,' answered the three Cajun boys in unison.

When they boarded the train, the three Northerners crammed themselves into a toilet and the three Cajuns crammed into another toilet just down the way. Shortly after the train began to move, one of the Cajuns left their toilet and walked over to the toilet in which the Yankees were hiding. The Cajun knocked on the door and said, 'Ticket, please.'

There's just no way on God's green earth to explain how the Yankees won the civil war.

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Salty

THANKSGIVING MENUS AND TIPS

A GREAT PLACE TO SHOP

MESSAGE FROM THE QUEEN

To the citizens of the United States of America from Her Sovereign Majesty
Queen Elizabeth II

In light of your failure in recent years to nominate competent candidates
for President of the USA and thus to govern yourselves, we hereby give
notice of the revocation of your independence, effective immediately.
(You should look up 'revocation' in the Oxford English Dictionary.) Her
Sovereign Majesty Queen Elizabeth II will resume monarchical duties over all
states, commonwealths, and territories (except Kansas, which she does not
fancy).
Your new Prime Minister, Gordon Brown, will appoint a Governor for America
without the need for further elections.
Congress and the Senate will be disbanded. A questionnaire may be
circulated next year to determine whether any of you noticed.
To aid in the transition to a British Crown dependency, the following rules
are introduced with immediate effect:
------------ --------- --
1. The letter 'U' will be reinstated in words such as 'colour,' 'favour,'
'labour' and 'neighbour.' Likewise, you will learn to spell 'doughnut'
without skipping half the letters, and the suffix '-ize' will be replaced
by the suffix '-ise.' Generally, you will be expected to raise your
vocabulary to acceptable levels. (look up 'vocabulary' ).
------------ --------- ---
2. Using the same twenty-seven words interspersed with filler noises such as
''like' and 'you know' is an unacceptable and inefficient form of
communication. There is no such thing as U.S.English. We will let
Microsoft know
on your behalf. The Microsoft spell-checker will be adjusted to take into
account the reinstated letter 'u'' and the elimination of '-ize.'
------------ -------
3. July 4th will no longer be celebrated as a holiday.
------------ -----
4. You will learn to resolve personal issues without using guns, lawyers, or
therapists. The fact that you need so many lawyers and therapists shows
that you're not quite ready to be independent. Guns should only be used for
shooting grouse. If you can't sort things out without suing someone or
speaking to a therapist,then you're not ready to shoot grouse.
------------ --------- -
5. Therefore, you will no longer be allowed to own or carry anything more
dangerous than a vegetable peeler. Although a permit will be required if
you wish to carry a vegetable peeler in public.
------------ --------- -
6. All intersections will be replaced with roundabouts, and you will start
driving on the left side with immediate effect. At the same time, you will
go metric with immediate effect and without the benefit of conversion
tables. Both roundabouts and metrication will help you understand the
British sense of humour.
------------ --------
7. The former USA will adopt UK prices on petrol (which you have been
calling gasoline) of roughly $10/US gallon. Get used to it.
------------ -------
8. You will learn to make real chips. Those things you call French fries
are not real chips, and those things you insist on calling potato chips are
properly called crisps. Real chips are thick cut, fried in animal fat, and
dressed not with catsup but with vinegar.
------------ -------
9. The cold, tasteless stuff you insist on calling beer is not actually beer
at all. Henceforth, only proper British Bitter will be referred to as beer,
and European brews of known and accepted provenance will be referred to as
Lager. South African beer is also acceptable, as they are pound for pound
the greatest sporting nation on earth and it can only be due to the beer.
They are also part of the British Commonwealth - see what it did for them.
American brands will be referred to as Near-Frozen Gnat's Urine, so that all
can be sold without risk of further confusion.
------------ ---------
10. Hollywood will be required occasionally to cast English actors as good
guys. Hollywood will also be required to cast English actors to play
English characters. Watching Andie Macdowell attempt English dialogue in
Four Weddings and a Funeral was an experience akin to having one's ears
removed with a cheese grater.
------------ ---------
11. You will cease playing American football. There is only one kind of
proper football; you call it soccer. Those of you brave enough will, in
time, be allowed to play rugby (which has some similarities to American
football, but does not involve stopping for a rest every twenty seconds or
wearing full kevlar body armour like a bunch of nancies).
------------ ---------
12. Further, you will stop playing baseball. It is not reasonable to host
an event called the World Series for a game which is not played outside of
America. Since only 2.1% of you are aware there is a world beyond your
borders, your error is understandable. You will learn cricket, and we will
let you face the South Africans first to take the sting out of their
deliveries.
------------ --------
13. You must tell us who killed JFK. It's been driving us mad.
------------ -----
14. An internal revenue agent (i.e. tax collector) from Her Majesty's
Government will be with you shortly to ensure the acquisition of all monies
due (backdated to 1776).
------------ ---
15. Daily Tea Time begins promptly at 4 p.m. with proper cups, with saucers,
and never mugs, with high quality biscuits (cookies) and cakes; plus
strawberries (with cream) when in season.
God Save the Queen!

Attached Images

Elizabeth.jpg (3.3 KB, 0 views)

Should've added "You must stop brushing your teeth."...

__________________
"You get the respect that you give" - cnredd

How to tell that Fox News is mad at McCain...

__________________
"As in a poker game where the chips were concentrated in fewer and fewer hands, the other fellows could stay in the game only by borrowing, when their credit ran out, the game stopped."
--Marriner S. Eccles, FDR's fed Chairman. (1951)