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Old 12-18-2007, 04:39 AM
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Default Why one Muslim girl became a born-again virgin for her wedding night

You want backwards?..You got backwards...

Why one Muslim girl became a born-again virgin for her wedding night

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When Aisha Salim marries her fiance in Pakistan next March, it will be the wedding of her dreams.

Wearing a veil and gown, she will be every inch the fairytale virgin bride and as befits her strict Muslim religion, after the ceremony, she will hand her blooded wedding-night sheets to her in-laws as proof of her virginity.

But far from being the traditional untouched bride that many Muslim families demand, she is a modern-day university graduate who has smoked, drunk, made love to - and even lived with - a previous English boyfriend.

To disguise the fact that she has had sex, she has paid for painful surgery to "restore" her virginity.

It is a drastic and costly measure but as she takes her husband's hand in marriage, she knows it is one which may - quite literally - save her life.

The horror and outrage that would ensue if it was discovered she had already slept with a man would be so damning that her own strictly religious relatives might kill her rather than face public shame.

"My virginity was restored in a delicate operation just last week, and I honestly view it as life-saving surgery," says Aisha.

"If my husband cannot prove to his family that I am a virgin, I would be hounded, ostracised and sent home in disgrace. My father, who is a devout Muslim, would regard it as the ultimate shame.

"The entire family could be cast out from the friends and society they hold dear, and I honestly believe that one of my fanatically religious cousins or uncles might kill me in revenge, to purge them of my sins. Incredible as it may seem, honour killings are still accepted within our religion.

"Ever since my family arranged this marriage for me, I've been terrified that, on my wedding night, my secret would come out. It has only been since my surgery last week that I've actually been able to sleep properly. Now, I can look forward to my marriage."
This is jaw dropping from so many angles it's almost incomprehensible...

Let's recap...

1) She's British, but is going to be in arranged marriage...

2) Because of her surgery she now looks forward to her arranged marriage...

3) She's intentionally lying in her relationship...

4) She going to show bloody sheets to the families to prove virginity...

5) Failing to be a virgin for marriage is a death sentence...

6) This death sentence will be carried out by her own family...

Fundamental Islam...Setting women's (and humanity's) rights back to the Stone Age...
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Old 12-18-2007, 12:26 PM
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Default Re: Why one Muslim girl became a born-again virgin for her wedding night

I was acquainted with a Syrian couple a few years back, who were dreading their two daughters' teen years. They desperately wanted to make enough money to move back to their home country.
They were like many of us in that they really
didn't know just how different the West was from the East till they encountered it face to face.
They were concerned about protecting their daughters from America's culture.
Who is to say what is right or wrong within another's core belief system?
The rituals that we (and they) see as barbaric in the other are tied to what has kept us each from disappearing from the face of the earth: Faith.
But now that the word is out, I wish these people would take more precautions allowing their children access to Western culture.
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Old 12-18-2007, 12:59 PM
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Default Re: Why one Muslim girl became a born-again virgin for her wedding night

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Fundamental Islam...Setting women's (and humanity's) rights back to the Stone Age
I'm speechless...and they fear western civilization?..
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Old 12-18-2007, 02:08 PM
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Default Re: Why one Muslim girl became a born-again virgin for her wedding night

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I'm speechless...and they fear western civilization?..
Unfortunately, there are assorted cultures that do horrible things in the name of religion.


Children are targets of Nigerian witch hunt | World | The Observer
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Old 12-18-2007, 02:16 PM
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Default Re: Why one Muslim girl became a born-again virgin for her wedding night

I'm with Salt...The parents made it through life under these rules and it's not the population of the Muslim countries is suddenly plummeting. These "rules based on religion" might seem extreme, but it's just discipline as far as I'm concerned. They don't have a culture where a dude can walk down the middle of the street in a leather S@M suit while his boyfriend hits him with a whip.

All she really had to do was not screw. She knew to consequences. And they are probably worse if her lie gets found out.
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Old 12-18-2007, 02:21 PM
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Default Re: Why one Muslim girl became a born-again virgin for her wedding night

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Originally Posted by KnightOfSappho View Post
Unfortunately, there are assorted cultures that do horrible things in the name of religion.


Children are targets of Nigerian witch hunt | World | The Observer
Yep...That's the truth. And thing is...It's also a social phenominon, not just a religious one.

Jewish traditions in some countries, still hold to to the tradition of stoning a girl if she's thought to have had pre-maritial sex and broken her 'marriage contract'...In Asian countries young girls are killed by their parents if the parents feel that the young girl has lost her virginity outside of marriage. Certain African tribal customs hold a similar viewpoint in regards/reactions to the issue of 'purity' of the bride...And in Western cultures(especially the US) there's been instances that because of that religous punishment, some girls have resorted to suicide rather then live with that type of punishment...Or killed their new born to hide from family/congregation that they weren't 'chaste/pure' anymore.

Seems to me, that irregardless of society/culture/religious views, we still have a ways to go ourselves before we start passing judgement on how another society/culture/religion acts/does within their own...

And even though Western culture considers these acts 'barbarious' now and have a more 'modern' approach to sexuality, that still doesn't stop from girls being obstricized from a family/community because they participated in pre-maritial sex...They may not have a physical death, but the way they are treated by family and congregation results in an emotional/spritual killing for 'being unpure'...

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Old 12-18-2007, 02:25 PM
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Default Re: Why one Muslim girl became a born-again virgin for her wedding night

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I'm with Salt...The parents made it through life under these rules and it's not the population of the Muslim countries is suddenly plummeting. These "rules based on religion" might seem extreme, but it's just discipline as far as I'm concerned. They don't have a culture where a dude can walk down the middle of the street in a leather S@M suit while his boyfriend hits him with a whip.

All she really had to do was not screw. She knew to consequences. And they are probably worse if her lie gets found out.
and what of her prospecive husband?

Should he beheld to the same rules?
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Old 12-18-2007, 02:33 PM
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Default Re: Why one Muslim girl became a born-again virgin for her wedding night

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and what of her prospecive husband?

Should he beheld to the same rules?
The double standard is still alive and kicking no matter what part of the world you live in.
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Old 12-18-2007, 02:49 PM
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Default Re: Why one Muslim girl became a born-again virgin for her wedding night

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and what of her prospecive husband?

Should he beheld to the same rules?
I'm not defending the actual rules, just the culture that lives under them. I'm glad I don't live there. But they are their rules.

That being said, we DO circumcise our children here in the U.S. for what seems like mostly religious or maybe even cosmetic reasons.
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Old 12-18-2007, 02:49 PM
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Default Re: Why one Muslim girl became a born-again virgin for her wedding night

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Originally Posted by AlicornsPrayer View Post
Seems to me, that irregardless of society/culture/religious views, we still have a ways to go ourselves before we start passing judgement on how another society/culture/religion acts/does within their own...
That stagnates progress...

If no one speaks out for fear of being attacked due to their own customs, the no one speaks at all and nothing gets done to treat the worst cases...

Second, location has a lot to do with it...

If some Nigerian tribe is doing female circumcision (and with sharp rocks) in the middle of their own country, their isn't as much outrage...But that situation DRASTICALLY changes if they immigrated to Cleveland and continued that "custom" there...

That's what you're seeing in cases like this one...

Everyday, America bashers and Islam apologists like to complain how "The West" is meddling with the cultures and business of other countries (especially in the Middle east)...They say the West should keep to themselves and stop bringing their societal standards into other parts of the world...

Sadly, they don't say the very same thing when those same countries complaining about the West GO to the West and bring thier culture, which clashes with Western ideals, into that same realm...

It's a double standard...
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