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Originally Posted by talloulou
Now you see some of Amir's jealousy. Amir has low self esteem. Combine this with someone who's self-centered and sensitive and you get a boy who's a bit depressed.
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The jealously is what I was referring to earlier when I said that Amir might see Hassan as more priviledged. A child's ideas on 'wealth' usually have little to do with material things. Hassan had a Dad that paid attention to him and cared about him. Amir felt that his Dad did not do either.
All children are self-centered to some degree. It is part of human development. (This is why children often blame themselves when their parents divorce.) Amir, being an artistic child (as writers are), is more vulnerable to the sting of rejection.
Amir chastised himself for laughing when his father was sharing his thoughts on religion. He felt bad when his father sighed impatiently when the boy didn't understand what he was saying. From my perspective, his father simply did not know how to relate to a child, and Amir's reactions were a normal result of that.
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Amir sees his father as a man who's bigger than life itself and Amir overheard, by eavesdropping, that his father is surprised Amir is his son. Baba says he wouldn't believe it if he hadn't seen the boy pulled out of his wife with his own eyes which frankly is sort of an odd thing to say because it almost highlights the idea that there's room for doubt.
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I don't think so. I don't think that there was any question in Baba's mind that Amir was his son.
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I'm sure this is huge and taken in the absolute worst way by the young boy. I'm sure Baba loves his son, he just doesn't relate to him much because their personalities are so different. Perhaps Baba had expectations that his son would be A, B, C, & D, and instead he's faced raising a boy without a mother who's E, F, G, & H and he's at a loss.
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Amir's personality seems to be much more like his mother's from what we can tell so far. Interestingly, this is common among parents all over the world IMO. Parents often go into having a child as 'having a little me' and are at a bit of a loss if the child is extremely different from themselves. Unfortunaltely, his solution is to not spend too much time with Amir.
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Amir also feels guilt over his mother's death. She died during childbirth so in Amir's mind he killed her. Amir believes his father feels the same way but I don't think there is any evidence of that and I'm sure Baba would have denied it if asked.
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This is also common with the way that children think. In the absence of other information, they come to their own conclusions about the behavior of their parents. I think that he would have not raised such a question because he was afraid of a confirmation of his fears.
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Baba is, without question though, arrogant and this arrogance makes it harder for him to relate to his son. Baba is a man who feels he's learned certain truths in life, knows what's important, and knows what's not. The idea that he could be wrong or missing something never dawns on him. For example when Amir brings him a story it never even dawns on Baba to ask to read it. I don't think he's directly trying to hurt the boy by not asking to read it so much as it just literally doesn't occur to him that reading a story his son wrote might be important.
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I don't see Baba as arrogant. I see him as set in what he believes and he judges his experiences based on that. The things that Baba values are different than what Amir values. Baba does not seem to be that interested in books and stories; he is a more physical type. This is part of the reason why Rahim Khan becomes a critical person in Amir's life. Khan can understand that which his father cannot. Mind you, this is not the same as getting approval from the parent, which is what he is seeking.
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The story Amir writes is interesting too. A poor man who was a happy man that never shed a tear who then gets rich and ends up weeping helplessly.
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It was a profound story from someone so young. In order for the man to make himself happy, he had to make himself unhappy. It makes me wonder if that story, in some way, related to how he veiwed his father. When his father sat Amir on his lap to discuss religion, Amir was not sure if he should hug Baba or run away.